Most of us find it easy to show compassion for people stricken with misfortune. If someone is ill or otherwise hurt, the average person feels some degree of empathy for them. But what about the person who is inflicting hurt or hardship on others? Do you have compassion for them? Should you?
I thought about this while reading a news article about the so-called “praying robber.” Angela Montez was working at Cash Advance when a robber came in pointing a gun at her face. She began to cry and talk to the robber about her faith. The result? The armed robber got on his knees to pray with Angela. He inquired about how God might help with his hardships.
The two hugged and the robber confided in Angela about his problems. His name is Greg Smith and he had no intentions of hurting her. He hadn’t had a job in months and he was about to be homeless. He had a 1 year old daughter to care for and he was desperate.
Greg offered Angela his gun, but she refused to take it. That’s right. The robbery victim turned down an easy opportunity to disarm the robber. Determined to reassure Angela that she was safe, Greg removed the gun’s bullets and gave them to her.
I was astonished by the surveillance footage of the victim walking over to hug the robber as he kneeled in prayer. In recent interviews since the robbery, Angela has said, “I worried about him all night and then I was told he turned himself in and it was relief that I know he’s okay.”
Few people could see an armed robber as anything other than a low-life threat to society. Even fewer would decide to engage in hugging, talking and praying with someone who puts a gun to their head. I’m not sure what I would do in such a situation, but I’m definitely impressed by this story.
It is so easy to look at the actions of a person and make a judgment about who they are. If they do something bad, they may be judged by the masses as evil, immoral, heartless, or some other term that classifies them beneath others. But what if we open our hearts to take a deeper look? Could there be benefits in having compassion even for those who don’t seem to deserve it?
This is my position on the subject…. I believe that all harmful actions come from a miserable emotional place. It hurts to be alienated, misunderstood or misjudged. It hurts to feel lonely, lost, confused, scared or helpless. And hurt people hurt others. As they spiral downward, they (consciously or subconsciously) find ways to bring others down with them. No, every hurt person doesn’t become a gun wielding criminal, but the pain is indeed dispersed.
I believe that we are all one. When we reach out to help someone else, we help ourselves. Our feelings of compassion, love, and understanding contribute a positive vibration to the Universe. That vibration attracts desirable circumstances into our lives. We feel better because we think better about ourselves, others, and our world in general. On the other hand, when we put out fear, hate, and insensitivity for others, the negative vibration of those thoughts attracts negative circumstances for our own lives.
In other words, you are never just helping or hurting another person. The life that you change when offering the best within you, even to those who don’t seem deserving, may be your own.
On the Oprah show, Greg Smith said that Angela Montez spoke to him in a comforting way that even his mother had not. These two people found a way to see beyond their roles in a normally violent situation. Angela became a real person to Greg, rather than a resource that stood between him and the bank’s money. Greg became a person to Angela rather than the robber who could end her life. They each saw the other as someone with feelings, fears and needs. Someone every bit as human as the person in the mirror. And they reacted to those thoughts and feelings by showing compassion for each other. Angela listened to Greg and hugged him. Greg did everything that he could to give Angela a feeling of security under the circumstances. They saw the humanity that is a part of us all.
It is not my suggestion that every robbery victim start praying and talking, but it is my belief that there is more risk in being ruled by fear than there is in compassionately opening your heart.
“A truly compassionate attitude toward others does not change even if they behave negatively or hurt you.” -His Holiness the Dalai Lama
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{ 18 comments }
A very touching story indeed. I generally agree with your thinking on the subject. Recently I’ve seen a great video about compasion on TED – http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/karen_armstrong_makes_her_ted_prize_wish_the_charter_for_compassion.html . I think you might find it interesting..
Thank you, Kuhinie. I enjoyed the video very much.
I believe you should always respect people especially ones who are strangers to you.
When people are in a stressful state of mind it becomes a time when you are not making good decisions and become desperate with fear. Fear is added and unfortunately you become easy to manipulate.
The story above was a fortunately one with a great ending.
Thanks for sharing it.
Thanks for reading the story, Bunny. I really appreciate your feedback.
Though we get annoyed for the people causing inflicting hurt or hardship on us, they are the people who need our compassion. It is so painful to know that these people are not aware of their cruel acts which causes hardships to others.
Welcome to the blog. Thanks so much for contributing your feedback.
Thank you for the wonderful story. It tested my heart – I have tried to answer either my personal blog looks like the robber’s gun, or the Angela Montez’ response and recognized oneself in them both.
I could muse on that for a long, yet my Lithuanian-English dictionary is so thin… thus please accept my hot THANK YOU. You didn’t hurry to judge, but wish to understand. Your love shine with great wisdom.
http://artbytomas.blogspot.com/
Tomas your English was good. My Lithuanian would be quite the opposite. Thanks for reading this story and I’m glad you enjoyed it. It definitely touched my heart.
Great article, I do always wonder at times from the point of view of the person committing the hurt, I wonder what triggered them to hurt another, something must be wrong, if its a robber maybe he must have really needed the money to jeopardize his life to commit such a crime….neways…great article!!!
Great article, just great.
Hello Nea. I do think there are some truly bad apples out there, but obviously this guy wasn’t one of them. It truly is wonderful to see how the would-be victim here turned things around and the story has such a good ending. If only these were the stories we saw on these news all the time instead of the constant negative and scare-drama we see instead. Thanks!
Hi Nea, I’m a new visitor.
What a beautiful, beautiful post and your enourmous inner beauty shines through! I completely believe this: “…that we are all one” and that entire paragraph.
Thank you!
Welcome Belinda. I’m honored to have you here reading my posts. Thanks for putting an extra big smile on my face this morning.
I love this post Nea. There’s a reason behind an action. Sometimes, I get the feeling that criminals are nothing but a product of selfish society. I believe that from the bottom of my heart.
Very nice site!
I am very inspired by this post and really appreciate the writer.
@Kalil I am 99.99% agree with you that criminals are product of our selfish society , to reduces crimes we should need to bring some change & reform in our society.
It truly is wonderful to see how the would-be victim here turned things around and the story has such a good ending. If only these were the stories we saw on these news all the time instead of the constant negative and scare-drama we see instead.
Very touching story. If only more people were willing to treat others as kind as she did, this world would become a much better place to live.
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All the best,
Rizal
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