Unless you’ve spent your entire life as a hermit, interacting solely with yourself, you are no stranger to verbal disagreements—better known as arguments. We’ve all had our fair share of them and most of us could use a few tips on effectively communicating when an agreement is out of the question.
Let’s start by analyzing a few common phrases and argument techniques that turn a minor dispute into a bitter feud.
Communication Blunders and Bad Argument Tactics – Part 1
1. “That makes no sense”
You can’t expect anything positive to come from telling a person that you think what they’re saying is stupid. A better choice of words would be, “I don’t understand” or “this does not make sense to me.”
The idea is to communicate how you are relating to the other person’s perspective without casting a negative judgment upon what they are saying.
2. “I told you so”
I vote to completely remove the phrase “I told you so” from the English vocabulary. If you believe a circumstance has happened that proves your previous point to be correct, there’s a great chance that the other person recognizes this without you throwing it in their face.
If possible, catch yourself before these words come out of your mouth and think about what you will accomplish. You won’t make the other person more likely to listen to you in the future, but you may leave them feeling negatively about their choice. And you have greater issues that need to be addressed if hurting the other person is what you desire from a quarrel.
If you are so insecure or egocentric that you have an obsessive need to be proven right, you may benefit more from self improvement information than the person you’re arguing with.
3. “It doesn’t matter”
If you’ve thrown this phrase around in the middle of an argument, you know that it is usually not true. The very fact that you’re going back and forth with someone on an issue means that it matters. Nonetheless, we often get frustrated and just want the disagreement to end.
Unfortunately, an issue that is left unaddressed will fester within. And it will resurface like a thief in the night when you least expect it. [Read the full blog article →]
Nea is a Life Transformation Coach who believes happiness should never be optional.
If you’re ready to live a happier, more fulfilling life and you want to know how Nea can help you overcome what stands in your way, contact her now or click the link here to learn more about life coaching
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Hi, I'm Nea. As a 
